But I'm a Cheerleader: A Drop Dead Diva Recap

This week’s Drop Dead Diva laid out how I think they are planning to harpoon this show out of existence.  Now, the hardest part of any show like this is how to lay it all to rest and unfortunately it seems like they are going the route of slowly unraveling the cast.  With this being the 5^th episode of what varies between a 10 and 12 show run I think we can see that there is going to be a lot of moving on in the next few episodes and that makes me sad on two fronts.  First, I’m sad this cute little show is going to be leaving and second that they are getting such a stereotypical send off.

So, what’s going on at Harrison and Parker this week as we burst open the firm’s doors.  The twosome of Grayson and Jane seems to be heating up, or is it?  It seems like it’s in that kissing kind of purgatory stage and it’s obvious that Jane is starting to compare herself to Deb as she fights against the negative feelings about her body and her new found personality.  Either way, with pushes from Stacy or the film “It Happened One Night,” (which is adorable, if you haven’t seen it you should… in fact do it know!  Seriously, save this page and go watch it… I’ll wait… Got it? Okay then) Grayson send out signals that he is trying to reenact their first “sex date.”  I find this beyond creeptastic!  I don’t care if she has the soul of the same woman; you set another story damn it!  Don’t make it a repeated process!

So in the background of the firm’s heart and soul are Teri and Paul who find themselves in deep water after Teri attempts to help with Paul’s mounting credit card debt with a strongly worded letter.  What’s wrong with a letter?  Well, if it’s from a fake lawyer on real firm stationary, we are talking felony charges.  See, suits makes it look way easy to fake being a lawyer, but I do give Teri credit for her creative name play.  I’d totally hire a lawyer named Ms. Muffintop!

So what’s on the docket as far as new clients?  How about a bullied cheer leader who had a melt down on TV that has gone absolutely viral?  She claims that the head cheerleader is almost like a mafia don pressuring the other pom-pom’s to snub her, threaten her, demean her and altogether haze her out after she refused to “kiss her ring.”  Big deal right?  I mean it’s cheerleading… Well I’d have to say that I feel for her, I’ve been on teams where I was clearly not wanted and it can be soul crushing.  Not to mention, bullying is a huge buzzword and it’s big enough to get the LA Time’s attention as they send a reporter to help the cheerleader along (Note that she is included in the confidentiality agreement because that’s the only way this case works). 

In the other office of Mr. Owen French, a family sits in danger of losing their 3^rd generation family home, their crime?  Putting in speed bumps that damaged the wheels and rims of the overpriced car belonging to some fat cat suit who is friends with the mayor.  Now facing a lien that local government refuses to remove, it is up to Owen to save the house using his out of the box thinking.

The cheerleaders have closed ranks, or so it would appear and appear to be turning on the victim of Jane’s case, and with good reason.  Why?  Because, if they speak out against the queen bee, head cheerleader, and ultimate terrorist in the group they can lose paid gigs and personal appearances which is how these girls survive.  In truth these girls only make 100 a game and that’s not much when compared with how much it costs to maintain a cheer lifestyle.  Knowing that she can’t get  current member, Jane tells the reporter that she plans on calling a former member as a surprise witness, why she thought that was okay I’m not sure but the reporter prints it and the team hires the disgruntled pep girl keeping her from testifying.

In Owen’s case the creative response is to suceed from the U.S. and I’m going to throw this out there, Family Guy did it better so I stopped caring.  Sometimes you just use the ridiculousness as a moment to zone out and polish your nails.  Back in Jane’s case they have been after the wrong pom-pom shaker, as the supposed victim turns out to be a sham!  There was never any bullying, but the job assignments are real, so let’s be fair.  Jane uses the reporter to expose the corruption of personal appearance’s due to the signed confidentiality wavier that gives her access to the story, how that really all works I wasn’t sure and partly didn’t care… Let’s face it we just like to see the firm win!

Speaking of the firm, here is when you get knocked in the feels.  Grayson has caught Teri’s charade and decides to turn her in to Kim.  That’s right, he went to the woman who will gladly water board a teenager to get a confession… No she’s never done that, but I think she would.  In response Teri ends up in the hoosegow and Jane is right in the middle.  It’s not looking good for those two, but it’s looking like we won’t be seeing Teri around the office anymore.  I hope she isn’t gone forever.